Richard Gere

Ah Herschel my friend, how have you been?

Oh Elijah. Good to see you. I am very well thank you.

What have you been doing with yourself other than Jewish stuff?

I dabbled in the cinema the other night.

Oh really? What did you see? Nothing scandalous I hope.

No, just a story about a man and his dog called Hachi.

WHAT? You saw Hachi?

Yes. It was lovely. Is there a problem with that my friend?

Oy vey! Yes, there is. Don't you know about Richard Gere?

No.

Richard Gere isn't just a filthy Buddhist but he's a- He's a monster!

Do tell.

Well Richard Gere likes to make clones of himself, murder them and then have sex with them. Then he revives them with necromancy and asks them "Was it good for you?" Then he kills them again and places them in his ex-wife; Cindy Crawford's bed, so that she thinks she has killed him in her sleep, but it's really just his clone.

Wow. I never knew an actor's life could be so exciting.

Enough of that Herschel. Remember, we are Jews.