Blessed Security Helpline.

Hello, 'Blessed Security Helpline'. Brian Blessed speaking, how may I help?

...oh, it's you again!

I'm afraid I'm going to have to drag you into the station, my dear. You're a filthy, rotten bastard and I'm going to have to sort you out. You're going to feel the full strain of the truncheon I keep in my trousers.

It's good if you come clean now and confess, but, believe me, it's much better if you let me chain you up and draw your dirty, little secrets out of you. Handcuffs, humiliation, candlewax for the nipples. Oh, you'll never be the same again.