(1000th Post)

Ow do! Name's Michael Owens and I lived all m'life 'ere in Yorkshire. I always bin jus' a regular bloke I tell thee, nothing fancy about me until I won big money with the National Lotto. Well, could I believe it? By 'eck I couldn't. Don't know what I'm gon' do with this big money I've won. The wife wants a 'oliday to Majorca. I told the lass your not be spending it all at once, no she won't. I mean, look at the size o' it. It's as big as me 'ead. I could do a lot with this 50p. I could brutally beat an infant child t'death with it, sail across the River Thames on it, I'll need m'first mates license for that so I will, or I could even invade a neighbouring EU country with it, say Belgium or Luxembourg, one o' them shite countries. The possibilities are endless, dare I say... But for now, I think I'll jus' put it in m'pocket.