Victorian Males Were Often Named Victor.

Woman! This child does not adequately function, and I request you take him back immediately!

You see, I require him to fetch and bag the fruits I sell on my trading barge. Yet, all this ghastly child wants to do is gargle, laugh at the flying pigeons and ... dare I say, 'sully' his own undergarments.

Also, his remote-control function is far from satisfactory. I have to sell twice the amount of Rambutans I'm used to, in order to buy enough coal-fired power cylinders to keep him in his perpetual malaise. He is also without Bluetooth connectivity.

I have a valid receipt.