Ahmed's All Organic Diner.

I've gotta say Ahmed, your restaurant is pretty shitty. I mean, for starters you've got us all sat on the floor. You won't let us sit on that sweet-looking bench over there. The food, pizza, was clearly purchased from across the road at that Pizza Hut outlet. And like, you're charging double what clearly costs only 4.99 - judging by what that huge advertising banner Pizza Hut have in their window says. Also, there's no roof to this place - there's gutter rain pissing all across the floor. You've got no art on the walls, and ... uh, the 'ambient music' you're playing on the boombox is Edwyn Collins. Edwyn fucking Collins, dude! And it's being totally drowned out by the sounds coming from the building site down the road. I'm telling you man, I don't mean to be pointing any fingers or anything - but there's no way Renee Zellweger has eaten here. You're full of shit.